do you like roller coasters?

I don’t like roller coasters.

Especially not the emotional kind I’ve been on lately.

Just when I start feeling positive and motivated and hopeful…around the next bend, Whhooosh, right back down again.

I hate it.

And just like a real roller coaster, you can’t get off if you don’t like it, you just have to ride it out to the end.

I am trying so hard to keep moving forward but this feeling of one step forward, two steps back, is driving me absolutely crazy.

I know I am making progress.

Every day is another step forward, no matter how tiny.

I look forward to just feeling like myself again, not having to worry if the ground is going to fall out from under me every day.

Every day I wake up, I tell myself

“Today is going to be a good day”

Some days it’s even true.

IMG_5715

( I wrote this one morning last week. The day before I’d woken up feeling ok, by lunchtime I was a bit emotional,  by dinner time I was a walking disaster, the next morning I was feeling better but still a little bit off, by lunchtime I felt ok again. Sometimes my mood changes so fast even I can’t keep up!)
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